Your forum is considering adding a new member, and one current member is concerned about a potential candidate, saying some variation of:
- We have close mutual friends.
- Our spouses are close friends.
- The CFO of my company is a good friend of this person.
- This potential forum mate had a close, longstanding relationship with one of my co-founders and their spouse.
- We were in the same MBA class, executive education program, or section at business school.
In situations like this, it’s important to be fully transparent about any potential conflicts of interest. The key question: Can I be open and honest about all aspects of my life with this possible new member?
Additional clarifying questions: What is the exact nature of the relationship? How close is it in practice? Is there regular contact/communication? (Sometimes people say they are “close” but rarely see each other.)
Keep in mind that in YPO, members and their spouses are usually each in a forum, are friendly with many other members and spouses, and see each other regularly at monthly chapter meetings. There are many close relations, but forum confidentiality is still fully respected. Everyone keeps in mind the clear boundaries between what is said in forum and what is shared in other settings to avoid violating forum confidentiality.
In summary, there is no simple answer – neither an automatic rejection, nor a blind acceptance of the new member. The nuances of each case must be carefully considered.